Thursday, September 18, 2008

Hoping for exhaustion..

Exhausted? I've been working 12 hour days all week. I'm beyond exhausted.

Latest on my father-in-law:

Nothing new to report, really, except for that my Mother in law says that what-ever-it-is, it's the size of two fists, and he's having trouble breathing. Sister in law says that it was an anxiety attack, and that seems reasonable, considering that he just learned he's got a growth in his lung, but I'm no doctor.

I told my husband to re-think his plans (or lack thereof) to fly to Florida to be with the family over Thanksgiving. He's all about the cost and such, but he can afford it. When he balked at my suggestion, I told him this:

"If something happens to your DAD, you will WANT to be with your family...and that's that!", and that was the end of the discussion because I was VERY firm, which is sometimes what it takes with this hard-headed man.

In any case, whichever way things go, the fact is, he WILL be going to Florida whether he wants to or not, because frankly, he will be one lonely puppy if he DOESN'T go, since I'm starting to plan for it for me.

The thought that it might be the last Thanksgiving with Dad is pretty hard--hubby says that he doesn't think his dad will opt to treat it if it's malignant--well, now there's a scary thought. Just give up and let it take you? Not me! I'd be in the hospital in a heartbeat saying "GET RID OF IT NOW! I DON'T WANT IT! I NEVER WANTED IT!" And when I had that lympoma (not to be confused with lymphoma) on my left shoulder, I told the doctor that he needed to prep me for surgery, because there was no way that I was having that "thing" on my back where I couldn't watch what it was doing. I was so surprised that I had a lump on my back, that I simply acted and then it was gone.

Poof.

The biggest thing is that you really can't ACT until you know what you're dealing with, so you can prepare yourself mentally and emotionally for something as major as LUNG surgery. So I can understand why dad might have an anxiety attack--especially since he doesn't allow his feelings to be on his face. Mom says that he hasn't even dealt with it yet, and thinks he's working too hard at trying to NOT deal with it, but what can you do before the doctor says "here's what it is..here's your options".

We find out later today.

Here I am with a class to teach in Hastings on dying on Saturday, so the only day I have to work this out with his dad (and of course, he wouldn't even talk to anybody about it all day Thursday, even though my hubby wanted to talk on the phone with him), is SUNDAY, and I seriously don't want to wait that long...

So I told hubby that he's to go over to his folks on Saturday, and that I'll meet him there after the class--I'm seriously hoping that everything turns out okay.

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