Okay, folks, let's mix it up a bit!
There's a reason we took 2nd place in Georgetown--and now, I'm a tad more aware of what it was that happened, and why one of the snare drummers was SO bent out of shape.
The reason is that the mid-section (read that "tenors") sucked.
First off, five minutes before we're to go "on" for the competition, the bass drummer (grade 1 from Toronto Police bass drummer) wants us to do this simple little "bit" when the snares cut out, but he only wants 3 tenors to do it, and *I* was not chosen to be one of them...that was the first and the second mistakes--both made by the bass drummer. Since I wasn't chosen to play that bit, I cut out completely (otherwise, I missed only ONE part which was my mistake), but since everyone else sucked big time, I didn't think my one mistake would be quite so noticable.
So from that standpoint, the snare drummer who stomped about the fairgrounds, completely irate over the scores and our taking second place (and don't you dare think that I didn't know that the tenor section counts more in Canada--because I *DO* know), had EVERY reason to be as completely irrational as he was. Do I sound a tad miffed with that person? I mean, if we're going to point fingers, Mister Snare Drummer, shall we point them in the direction they belong, instead of to the tenor corps (of which I am a part) in general?
Personally, I can point my finger inward with respect to the one mistake I made, but beyond that, I am not responsible. I whined about the change 5 minutes before going into the competition, but my voice apparently counts for nothing. Twenty years experience, and several months working with people who are NOT well prepared--frankly, I should have opened my mouth and said "NO! If you feel the need to change things 5 minutes before going on, then we aren't going on, period!" Unfortunately, doing something like that under an already stressful situation, and you have FIRE!
Having been through this before, indeed it's not my first dog and pony show, and knowing that the people he chose wouldn't have been able to follow through under duress, I feel responsible for not standing up and saying my piece and telling the bass drummer where he could put his beaters.
Ed is right. Someone needs to take the leadership role, and believe me, it's not me! But with serious consideration, there really isn't anybody else to do the leading. Ed says that in most of the medley, I am the one who is hitting my notes when I should. He also said that the flourishing needs a lot of work because we aren't together...So I need to come up with a dance studio nearby the Presbyterian Church so that we can practice in front of a lot of mirrors. The bathroom just doesn't cut it. And until we are doing it right, and without the music, we are not going to compete again.
And that's the bottom line, and I will put that forward to the Drum Major tonight.
I won't take no for an answer. Not even with simplification of the score! That just means that we have to start all over again from scratch, and I'm just not willing to do it. Shoot me if you want to, but I won't look like crap for anyone's sake, not even for a grade 1 bass drummer!
Whine whine whine.
So, Drum Major, I am pulling the tenor corps out of competition until we can all do the EXISTING music without the music sitting in front of us, because we can't fine tune anything if we're looking at music. We can't do our flourishing in concert, if we're concentrating on the music. I said it from the beginning...you need at least 21 weeks to learn it, and a lot of that is fine tuning. Here it is 16 weeks, and we still suck. Something is wrong. Ted's right. A professional would pull themselves out before going into a competition. Here I go! Tonight's the night. I will make my statement in front of the entire band...and apologize to the snare publicly on behalf of the tenor corps for the loss we all suffered. It wouldn't have happened if I'd pulled out, as I think the rest of the tenors would have followed suit if I had.
Sorry, folks, I just needed to vent. I got a phone call from Ed, and he said some things that have me fuming...and I don't fume well...in fact, I burn, then I spit, then I start screaming inside. Right now, the voices are saying
quit Quit QUIT QUIT
And while I could quit, I wouldn't feel very good about it. The temptation is great to put in a two-week notice...HA! Ed would have a coronary!
All of this? Judgement card reversed. You're considering leaving a situation that really isn't as bad as all that....
Oh, I WOULDN'T BE SO SURE!
So perhaps I won't fall apart, and I'll talk with Ted instead. Maybe I'll take the lead--and pull this together (HOW???????????? whine whine I don't have the energy!), but I'm not going to suffer that snare drummer again. He had his spout off time (never mind that he didn't point fingers at the time, but the statement that the Judge said we had the best drum line out there should have made it clear that he was harping on the tenors). I don't know. I don't know if I am going to do anything. I don't know that I have enough of a following or the respect that I need for others to follow me. Maybe I'll ask for it to be put to a vote??
In the meantime, I have to find a dance studio.
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