Well, Let me Tell you. Saturday was probably not so great a day. It started out okay. Really! Hubby, his son and I went to breakfast together, and had really good breakfast conversation about looking into the windmill that I would like to have for our property to help with generating electricity for our corn stove. It turns out that it's not so efficient as I hoped it would be (the windmill, not the corn stove), so we are basically abandoning the idea. The windmill would need to operate at nearly 30 times more than it would--and we aren't sure how that would happen.
And then we went to hubby's bank, and he withdrew the money to pay for my car repair. This was also a good thing, except for the part about having to pay him back. I really don't feel that I should have to do that. Husband's are supposed to work with you--and vice versa, but mostly, for you to be able to lean on when times are tough. Well, apparently, hubby is feeling a pinch, even though all my taxes money has been going into his account for the last 10 years. And we didn't argue about it, but on the way home, I suggested he stop for gas, as the Impala was getting low, and I knew I was going to have to use it next week, so I thought I would put gas in the car--and right in front of his son, he started bad-mouthing me.
Now, I realize that I didn't say "pull off and let me buy gas for this car so I can drive it next week". But that's no reason to get in my face in front of family.
I was angry and hurt. I even cried when I got home. I told him that I didn't think it was very nice of him to yell at me in front of his son that way. And he said I should have been more clear.
He still has not apologized, although later in the day, he acted a tad more kindly toward me. I barely spoke to him the entire day--and worked my buns off with him in the barn, in silence, on the wicker, then went into the house, made supper and went to bed early, completely worn out from being upset all day.
He doesn't get it. How can a man live with me for 10 years and be so clueless about how I feel? Why would he ASSUME that I expected HIM to put gas in his car for ME to use next week? Does he REALLY believe that I'm THAT big a deadbeat? Am I such a pain in the reverse that it's okay to treat me like crap in front of family?
I was so upset, and then while knitting Meisterdecke, the Addi Click I was using came apart, and I lost a stitch.
A single stitch. I was so distraught about it that I pulled out all 38 rows. I wasn't happy with how it was turning out anyway, but the whole day was just a washout, and I'm still trying to get over.
This morning (Sunday), I woke up with back spasms at 3am, and I'm just as exhausted as if I'd never slept. I'm thinking about coffee now that it's 4am. I might try to find my Addi Lace needles, and see if I have a size 4. I was using a size 5 in Addi Click, and it wasn't turning out very nice. I think a 4 would work much better.
Well, I suppose that I should reboot this machine and get it cleaned out. One of the groups I belong to on Yahoo allows attachments of pictures, and my hard drive fills up with them. I've been keeping abreast of email, but that's been a real job and a half. Those pics, though, take up twice the space, so they need to go when I'm done looking.
Perhaps today will be a better day. One can only hope.
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